Main Ideas: “Who Not How” by Benjamin Hardy


If you have enough money to solve a problem, then you don’t have a problem

  • A man who dares to waste one hour of life has not discovered the value of life — Charles Darwin
  • There is no limit to the amount of good you can do if you don’t care who gets the credit — Ronald Reagan
  • Try not to become a man of success but a man of value. A man of value will give more than he receives — Albert Einstein
  • Lessons are repeated until learned” — Dr Chérie Carter – Scott
  • The ability of the average man could be doubled if the situation demanded. In psychology, this idea is called the Pygmalion Effect.
  • “How” costs a lot of time.
  • Make the mental image. Make it clear. The ways and means will develop. Supply will follow the demand. You will be led to do the right thing at the right time and in the right way.
  • Personal confidence comes from making progress toward goals that are far bigger than your present capabilities.
  • As you get others involved that action enhances your desire and motivation to get serious and get focused. You put yourself in a situation where you rise to a higher occasion and where you have other people committed to helping you succeed.
  • “Who” expands your vision for what is possible because you no longer see yourself as the sole means of achieving the result. “Who” immediately connects you with different knowledge insights and capabilities.
  • You can survive without a community but you can’t thrive without one.
  • A core aspect of leadership is being explicit about the vision. The more explicit you are in what you want the faster you’ll attract the right Whos to help you achieve that vision.
  • The leader explains the What and Why and then allows the Who to execute the How
    as you engage in relationships you expand your efficacy as a person. Your efficacy is your ability to produce results.
  • Being able to articulate and express your goals is one of the most important and fundamental skills necessary for success. Only when your goal is clearly defined and persuasively expressed can you start getting the support you need to achieve your goals.
  • It is the role of the leader to determine what — which is the desired outcome or goal — and to provide clear feedback and direction when needed. It is not the role of the leader to explain how the job is done. The Who determines how they will best go about getting the job done. All they need is clarity about what specifically done looks like.
  • Be radically explicit about your goals Ask yourself: Who can help me accomplish this goal?
  • …before Joe connects with someone he does his homework. He wants to really know who the person is, what their context is, what they value, what they care about and what they’re trying to accomplish. Only then can he approach the relationship in a relevant and mindful way for the sole purpose of providing incredible value to them.
  • Breaking down your goals into 90-day increments is good for focus and motivation. By chunking down your goals into smaller steps you can focus more directly on what is right in front of you. You can make tangible and short-term progress and then look back every 90 days and measure tangible progress. This gives a sense of movement and momentum.
  • By letting Whos take care of the Hows the final product will actually be different and better than you initially imagined.
  • By seeing Whos as an investment rather than a cost you can create transformational relationships in which all parties give more than they take rather than transactional ones.
  • Don’t reach out to someone unless you have something meaningful to offer them.
  • Eliminating decision fatigue from your life should be one of your primary goals if you want to be a high performer and increase your income.
  • Every goal or project you initiate starts a new game. Each game requires different pieces and players — different Whos.
  • …he now lives every single day like it could be his last and even created an acronym for time: Today Is My Everything.
  • I used to hold on to my ideas much longer trying to refine them myself before sharing them with the audience. I was far less open to having the ideas changed through feedback It required far more courage to share the ideas back then. But I’ve done it so much now that my courage has been replaced with confidence.
  • Ideas generally come while you’re at home or in transit or during recreational activity. You need time and space and the most important relaxation and recovery to allow ideas and solutions to ferment and form.
  • If you are like most people the first thing you do when you imagine a bigger future is to ask yourself: How do I achieve this goal? Although this question seems intuitive it’s actually the worst possible question you could ask.
  • If you don’t yet know how to connect with people in this more conscious and reciprocal manner a great way to learn is simply by volunteering. Learn to serve other people without any expectation for reward. Learn to devote yourself to a cause and to other people’s goals even if you get no fanfare.
  • If you have enough money to solve a problem then you don’t have a problem.
  • If you want to get progressively bigger and better results in your life then you’ll need Whos, not Hows.
  • If you’re focused on doing everything yourself then you are dramatically limiting the resources you can direct toward your goals. If your resources are limited your potential your options and your future are limited too.
  • If you’re going to apply higher levels of teamwork in your life you’ll need to relinquish control over how things get done.
  • In order to create the right types of relationships, you need to be very clear about what you want. Not only do you have to know what you want but you must clearly communicate your desires to others.
  • It is only through teamwork and collaboration that you can achieve things you previously thought impossible. Things you can’t even dream of or imagine in your present situation.
  • Joe sees relationships like he sees clothing. If an outfit doesn’t fit right if it’s too tight or too baggy or if it’s not functional then the relationship doesn’t make sense.
  • The opposite of addiction is not sobriety — it is human connection.
  • Never enter a relationship without having first created value in that relationship. Never stop creating value and nurturing your relationships. Always ask What’s in it for them? rather than What’s in it for me? Know what the other person cares about. Get to know them, their context and their goals. Give relevant value. Don’t waste their time. Do your homework. If you want to develop transformational relationships then approach relationships in a transformational rather than transactional way. Bring a result to the table. Make the pie bigger for everyone involved. Don’t come with big promises of future results. Bring immediate results. Don’t promise what you can’t deliver. Be a generous giver who is truly committed to service and growth, not status.
  • Be nice to the people you meet on the way up because they are the same people you meet on the way down. Be grateful in large and small ways to the people in your life and you’ll attract an incredible abundance.
  • Once I’ve gotten the idea 50 percent formed then it’s time to tes t it on the audience who provides the other 50 percent. Every time I share the initial concept I’m always surprised by the feedback and comments I get.
  • Looking back over the past quarter what are the things you have achieved that make you the proudest? What are the current areas of focus and progress that make you the most confident? Looking ahead at the next quarter what new developments projects or goals are giving you the greatest sense of excitement? What are the five new jumps (progress) you can now achieve that will make your next 90 days a great quarter regardless of what else happens?
  • Procrastination is a psychological phenomenon that occurs when you really want something more for yourself, but you lack the knowledge and capability to do it. What procrastination means is that your goal or ambition is great. It’s something you’d like for yourself but you’re not the right person to execute the plan. Procrastination is a very powerful signal telling you that it’s time to get another Who involved. You’re stuck You need help.
  • Research has shown that the number one deathbed regret for most people is that they never took steps to do what they truly wanted to do with their lives. Instead, they procrastinated when it came to realizing their deepest dreams and settled for less.
  • Research shows that between 85–95 percent of college students are chronic procrastinators — meaning they cannot get themselves to do the work they need to do and as a result experience negative and undesired consequences.
  • The bigger your personal ambition the more procrastination you’ll experience. Everyone who is ambitious procrastinates.
  • Results, not the effort, is the name of the game. You are rewarded in life by the results you produce not the effort and time you put in.
  • Shift the question to Who can help me with this? By doing so you can stop procrastinating and feeling discouraged Instead you can experience an injection of energy confidence and creativity.
  • Supply actually follows perceived demand. When you believe something must be done, you somehow find the ability to get it done. This is why deadlines are so powerful. When there is a demand or requirement you find the motivation.
  • That’s what real leadership is: Creating and clarifying the vision ( the what ) and giving that vision greater context and importance ( the why ) for all Whos involved. Once what and why have clearly been established the specified Who or Whos have all they need to go about executing the How. All the leader needs to do at that point is to support and encourage the Who ( s ) through the process.
  • The best way to measure your progress is by noting the amount and quality of collaborations happening in your life.
  • The research is very clear on this point: the more decisions you have to make the lower the quality those decisions will become. You need to make fewer but better decisions.
  • The resources you obtain through relationships can be material like money possessions or friendship networks. But resources also include the other person’s perspectives such as how they appreciate the world and ascribe explanations for people’s behaviours. Resources may even be their time, attention or help.
  • There is an army of ready and willing Whos; capable people out there who want to do the very work you need to be done. All you need to do is communicate your vision to those people and define what successful completion looks like.
  • …together they co-founded a band called Metallica which went on to sell more than 100 million albums. It all started because Ulrich knew what he wanted. He put his desire on paper and his goal attracted the right Who.
  • TRANSFORMATIONAL LEADERS GIVE THE VISION AND GET OUT OF THE WAY
  • What would be possible for you if your capabilities and potential were expanded by other brilliant Whos?
  • What you can accomplish in relation to some people is very different from what you can do in relation to others. What you can become with some people is different than with others.
  • When the demands are high we show up. When they are low we settle.
  • When you develop collaborations particularly with world-class talent projects and businesses, you quickly expand far beyond the initial concept.
  • When you do find that Who you’ll see how ridiculously simple it was for them to produce your desired result then you’ll begin to see just how small you’ve been playing.
  • When you’re investment-minded you’re not short-term in your thinking. You consider the bigger picture and you look at how you can help the right people without coming across as transactional.
  • When you’ve defined what you want — and are very clear on all of the criteria for success — then you’ve got something that you can not only visualize but communicate.
  • Who has the skills, knowledge, connections and expertise to get this done ASAP?
    Who Not How is about teaching you how to focus on what you can do and then finding other Whos to do what they can do.
  • You absolutely need a Who if you’re trying to accomplish something new and challenging unless you’re fine not getting the result you want in the near future.
  • You expand yourself and your efficacy through relationships! Ultimately anyone who becomes highly successful does so through relationships.
  • You need an environment and situation forcing you to rise up to the level of your goals. In order to do that you need to increase the demand on yourself and others to produce the desired result.
  • Pressure can bust pipes or make a diamond. You need the pressure to succeed. You add that pressure by increasing your investment.
  • Your ability to succeed is based on the quality of the people in your life.
  • Your attention and energy should not be spread thin but purposefully directed where you can experience extreme flow and creativity.
  • Your efficacy as a person is based on the resources you have which are a direct by-product of your relationships. Every relationship can be viewed as teamwork directed toward a purpose.
  • Your team can and should operate seamlessly without you. This should be the goal of every entrepreneur. Having the freedom to relax recover play or do whatever you want is crucial for entrepreneurial creativity success and longevity.
  • Zig Ziglar once said: “You can have everything in life you want if you will just help other people get what they want“. Helping people get what they want doesn’t mean you’re doing all the Hows but rather that through your resources whatever those may be. You can enable them to get what they want and need.