If you hurt – you are alive

It seems like everyone have figured thing out. Other people’s lives seem easier and more comfortable than yours. Just because they were born in the right country, the right family – the life has move opportunities for them. You start feeling sorry for yourself. Coming out of the shithole, you had to fight for everything. Hard work or jail – were my only two ways out. The third one is always on a back of my mind, but that’s a dead end.

Seeing others live better than you make you feel that you’re wasting your time. Why not me? Maybe I don’t deserve? Maybe I am not good enough? Maybe I should just stop fighting and trying? Maybe I should just go with a flow as my photographer friend? Get myself a PlayStation and put down the blinds. Fuck sport, diets, work, ambition. What if this is the life I deserve and there is nothing more to it? What if instead of resisting, just accept it? Maybe then I’ll find stillness and fulfillment?

Accept everything that happens in your life as a game. To move on to the next level of the game, you have to pass this challenge. It will never be easy. The stronger you get, the bigger the obstacles get. I am tired of fighting…

Suffering comes from thinking that we deserve much more than we already have. What if everything that we have is exactly what we deserve? Accept and be grateful. The life was meant to enjoy, so stop fighting.

The sooner you learn life’s lesson, and the faster you’ll figure it out, the sooner you will move to another level. Again, once level higher – it will not be easier. Remind yourself of the past – the easy times. You had a job, money, relationships, possessions… You wish to get those things back, but you forgot that you wasn’t happy then either. WTF is wrong with you? You was always looking for a challenge. Now you’ve got the challenge, so why do you complain? The life had given you a great opportunity to grow, but now you are bitching that its too hard. Instead of embracing the suck and diving in, you look around and compare yourself to others.

You are an idiot. You live your life as if you had an infinite amount of time on this planet. If not, why do you waste it on these emotions and feeling sorry for yourself? There is no time. There are no spectators to feel sorry for you. No one cares about you, so you might as well be happy. If not, why living? There is no grey zone. You either happy or not. You either live or die.

If you hurt – you are alive.