90% or more of an emotional message in nonverbal. Unconsciously, we can easily sense anxiety or irritation is someone’s tone of voice. The study of 1,011 kids, the ones that were able to recognize nonverbal emotions in others, were among the most popular children in their schools.
Empathy and emotional sensitivity is a skill that has its roots in the childhood. Depending on the level of connection between parent and a child shapes the emotional expectations adult bring in his close relationships. Prolonged absence of emotional connection, misattunement between parent and child has tremendous impact on the way the little one expresses his emotions later in life. The child begins to avoid not only expressing, but even feeling the emotions. One study showed that the baby who had a mother consistently under-reacted to her baby’s level of activity, learned to be passive. An infant learned that when I get excited, I can’t make my mom excited, so I will not try anymore. While emotional ignorance of a parent dulls empathy, emotional abuse like sadistic threats, humiliation and raw meanness make kids overreactive to other people’s emotions. Many emotionally abused kids are really good at sensing what others around them are feeling.
Empathy requires person to be calm and receptive so the he is able to read the other person’s feelings.
Lovemaking is the act of mutual empathy, sensing each other’s emotional state and appropriately responding to it.